Let's go back in time to when I had no idea what I was doing... oh wait, that hasn't changed at all... Ok, let's just go back in time.
Ah yes, I feel this is going to lead to an eventual vulnerability hangover, so get ready.
I don't know many artists... or people for that matter who gleefully prance back into their past efforts. Maybe I don't hang out with the wrong people.
In my mind, I did it, it happened, another step on the path, no use in looking back buuuuuut there is a lot of use in looking back.
Plus, it might be fun. It doesn't feel fun as I write this because, oh man, did I have a lot to learn (and still do), but maybe we can all continue to learn together.
Anyway, whining and lollygagging aside, I decided to start digging up my old work for a few reasons:
1. Most of my old stuff is kind of weird, and thanks to Mr. David Lynch and some new Twin Peaks and a regained sense of confidence, I am so ready to get my weird on and revisit where I've been.
2. A few of my other films will be finishing up their festival run soon and I'm excited to share them on the internet. I thought this would be a fun way to ramp up to getting those out in front of a greater audience.
3. I've got an exciting and challenging project coming up where I'm going to need to bring my experimental filmmaking side back to life, so I have to make amends and reaquaint myself with ... myself.
So, we begin at the beginning, or as far back as I have copies of.
There's a few Super 8mm gems lost somewhere that were wonderfully strange and some horrible failures... exposure was a hard lesson learned. Oh, how my dear friends tolerated my many experiments... I should write them a long thank you card.
That brings us to my final project for the Intermediate Filmmaking Class at MSUM. We shot on 16mm negative - the image above is from the negative that we re-purposed, projected and recorded to add back into the film when we got the film and the digital transfer back from the developers.
I was really, really into a band called Russian Circles so I used one of their songs as inspiration.
I was also really really into high contrast lighting, no dialogue (mostly because it's hard and scary - still think that) and experimenting with the medium in general.
There's some stuff I really cringe at watching it now like my male-gazeyness, not super developed female characters, and a bunch of technical stuff I just really know yet.
Like many films, the idea just popped into my head and haunted me, compelling me to make it and it's success in that class solidified my resolve that there is a place for weird films and weirdos like my in this world. Trust me when I say that I would have made a more "normal" film if I could have...but I just couldn't, and I'm actually pretty happy about that.
So (cringe) here you go, for your entertainment, Carpe:
So, there it is. In all it's delicious black and white film glory.
Looking back I'm now seeing the influences I didn't know I had and immensely grateful that the world is full of people and artists willing to continue to take a step into the unknown and try something unusual.
I'm going to try to post a new, old film every week until I'm out of goodies to share.
So get ready! (eeeeeK)